Rally - Missing on Mull

Sadly my big pal Jaggy won’t make it to Mull this year, family matters have curtailed his annual pilgrimage. From the Festering Piles to the Mish, from the Mac to Macgochan’s there will be no trail of alcoholic slevvers marking his wayward progress around Tobermory harbour. Similarly there will be no unearthly presence ensconced on the bottom stair at the Salen Hotel or decorating the bars in Craignure.

Of course, he’ll also miss the intoxicating whiffs emanating from Scrutineering mixed with the occasional and most welcome aroma of the all too rare Castrol R fragrance. The spectatorial mayhem at the Dervaig junction and the comforting sounds of stab mells restoring bent steering arms and twisted metal back to some semblance of their original shape at Craignure service. And ‘service’ is the word, the whole Mull Rally experience is worthy of a worshipful ecclesiastical celebration.

Those memories only eclipsed by the mellifluous cacophony of four and six cylinder aural accompaniments making their red-lining angelic mechanical music as they pound over the lochs, around Calgary and doon the Glen. There’s simply nothing to beat the sights and sounds advancing on those gathered in a certain cemetary or sitting on the clammy wall as the damp seeps through the troosers and pants and into the very bones. It’s the searchlights sweeping the skies above Glen Gorm and Loch Frisa before bursting over the crest in a furious firework display of sparks, glowing brake discs and the furious bark and bellow of angry four wheeled monsters - and Kenny Watt’s wee Mini!

As for the rogue’s gallery below, if you see any of this lot, best give them a wide berth, they’ll only lead you into trouble and serious alcoholic iniquity. A rag tag bunch the lot of them.

Oh, and by the way, stay safe out there, whether watching, marshalling or competing – because you never know what might be making that rustling sound in the heather behind you in the silence of the creeping cold autumn darkness. It might even be the lost souls of those who have gone before and destined forever to roam the hills and glens - in search of tasty spectators!

 

The Book - The Final Proof

Dear rally readers, the printer’s proofs arrived this afternoon which necessitated one final read-through of the latest tome entitled ‘ The Scottish Rally Championship 2000-2009’. A couple of things required a wee change but otherwise, good to go.

However, despite the many read-throughs the proof-readers undertook (two) and myself (countless) there might well be something we’ve missed. It happens to the best of authors, proof-readers and publishers – and even AI (Artificial Incompetence) gets things wrong - but I’ll tell you what, if some smart git comes up to me, taps me on the shoulder and engages me in conversation starting with ‘By the way, did you not notice …. ‘.

Then be warned, I will not be held responsible for the ensuing consequences, which will either be a moothfae of dandruff (Glasgow kiss) or a boot up the exhaust depending on which way the complainant is facing at the time of utterance. And who knows? Some of the attending ‘Bears’ may well take umbrage at any slight to my person!

There are a couple of folk who in the past have taken great delight in pointing out any little errors that may have crept in to the narrative or style and to them I would advise extreme caution in their approach and choice of words. If they are not careful, even the nearest faraway place will not be a safe haven for them! I have gone skelly-eyed reading through this umpteen times and toleration levels are extremely low.

Anyway, job done, it has now been passed to the printer and book binder to do their stuff. As things stand we are on course for an early November launch but I will keep you appraised of date and location if you fancy attending the ‘official’ launch – in its now customary salubrious surrounding!

Copies of the first two books are still available:

https://fife-motor-sports-agency.square.site/

 

Book - Frazzled, but pleased

The last ten days have been pretty hectic. Yesterday I signed off the draft of the text and photograph layout for the next book, ‘The Scottish Rally Championship 2000-2009’ and that was the fifth draft!

David the designer didn’t know anything about rallying when we started this two years ago – he does now! But why five drafts you may wonder? The first draft is a rough layout with all the print and photographs with captions in place but the printer uses a system of ‘flow-text’. Each page is a template and the idea is you just paste, or ‘flow’ the whole text into the template. Fine in theory but when you start to add tables and photographs the text automatically adjusts itself but every time you add something, the ‘flow’ simply expands and you end up with ‘orphan’ words or jumbles where the text flows over a column, caption or heading.

David can manage this quite well but often needs someone who knows a bit about rallying and its technicalities to help him out and since he doesn’t know any one in the sport but me, he has little choice in the matter. So the first draft was tweaked and made to fit but that still upset a few lines and paragraphs in the second draft. There were fewer changes for the third draft and even fewer for the fourth and then I switched around some photos! Grrr! At least he’s still talking to me but the final draft has now been signed off.

Next step is the preparation of the printing plates from which I will get a finished copy of the book as it will appear in print, but not bound – it will come as a number of separate sheets with eight pages on each! That means another read through this weekend just to make sure that there have been no slip-ups when etching the plates.

It may sound awfy pernickety but that’s the nature of the task. David and Craig (the printer) know that and it’s a similar process for other books which they produce so I’m not their most difficult customer. Of course it would have been easier if I had sought a publishing company and just handed them the text and the foties but I wouldn’t have had the same control.

Anyway, that is where we’re at and hopefully still on course for publishing the new book in early November. Naturally I’ll keep you informed of the exact date.

As for the cover, well the decision has been made. The choice of Ken Wood for the 1980s book was dead easy, he won the title three times in that decade. Similarly the choice of Brian Lyall was equally appropriate for the 1990s as he uniquely won both the Scottish and ANCRO National Championship titles in the same year, 1997.

However, this latest book caused a wee bit of a headache. Two drivers each won the Scottish Championship twice during this ten year 2000s period, so which one to choose? Or should I put both pics on the front cover? As things turned out the choice was once again staring me in the face, it was just so bluidy obvious. Dohhhh!

Anyway, we’ll soon find out if you all agree – or not!!

The other side of rallying

One thing of which Knockhill has an excess, is weather. All flavours, varieties and intensities and last weekend we actually saw the best of it. It was cold on Saturday and the three wee rain showers which sped over the circuit soon dried off whereas Sunday was sunny and warm – when the sun shone, but awfy cold when it ducked behind some clouds! Nobody got drookit or frostbitten, a bonus, eh?

There were three generations of McRaes in attendance and an abundance of stars, personalities and VIPs all mixed in with a couple of on-stage rallies for the Junior 1000 Ecosse Challenge lads and lassies and an equally serious competition for the all-stars and their rather more powerful and gloriously noisy conveyances plus various processions and other entertainments.

And throughout the days there were roving hordes of autograph hunters wanting programmes, books, clothing and helmets signed by anyone they could waylay. As for the guests, they just mixed in with everybody and had a ball. It was grand. Even Sir Chris Hoy was out and about although he had to have a wee quiet sit-doon after each run in the rally car before facing the crowds and interviewers once again. Understandable. The man’s a marvel and an inspiration.

Speaking of interviewers, the concert stage in the Paddock was busy throughout both days and the dulcet tones of the ‘Larkhall Foghorn’ could even be heard down in the Trade Area – but we couldnae hear the guests!

Another thing I learned was that musicians cannae play the bagpipes with gloves on! Hazel Whyte’s finger tips were almost numb by the finish, but she gave it laldy did she not?

Mind you, the place was fair hoachin’ wi’ locusts. Rhona’s tablet supply in the Junior 1000 tent disappeared faster than Stuart Gray when it’s his round, and Mrs McCombie’s caramel tart tin was almost emptied by the voracious Moates mob next door. However, Bruce managed to save the day and kept a single tart for his big pal Jaggy Bunnet (aye, he wis there too!) although the chocolate coating looked suspiciously thin – I think somebody had given it a serious licking before putting it back in the tin!

Speaking of Bruce, he had the barbecue fired up and was dispensing burnt slices of coo to friends and guests washed doon wi’ bottles of fermented barley and waatter, whilst other barbecues around the overnight encampment lit up happy faces gathered around. However, up the ‘posh’ end of the Paddock there were dangers to be avoided. The Sheriff and Montana were in town along with others of that ilk with the smell of strong spirits lying heavy in the night air. Man it was a grand night - to be safely tucked up in bed away from such malevolent influences!

Typical of the other side of rallying there was a late night engine change in the service area on Saturday evening where three generations of the Wallace clan were awfy busy. The engine in Junior 1000 driver Caela Wallace’s Toyota Yaris had expired but the team had sourced a spare engine in a Perth scrapyard (late on a Saturday evening!) picked it up, brought it back to Knockhill and proceeded to change it under torch light with Dad Craig (who was also co-driving for John Marshall) helping out whilst grandad Colin ‘Crabbit’ Wallace oversaw proceedings - in an ‘advisory’ capacity only! It was an effort that would have had the Team Toyota Gazoo Racing personnel gazing open-mouthed in astonishment.

And then there was the stupid bet. Martyn Douglas and Ross Pringle had put a bet on, but both had troubles during the rally and the terms were changed to who would be fastest over the final two stages. A difference of nine seconds gave the advantage to Martyn while Ross had to suffer the forfeit – shave off HALF his beard. Wait till his Mammy sees him when he gets home!

That was the other side of an event which was won by rising star Max McRae and Cameron Fair by 30 seconds from Joe Cunningham and Joshua Beer with Matt Edwards and Neil Shanks third in John Wink’s Hyundai i20 while just 3 seconds separated the top two in the Junior 1000 Ecosse Challenge. Ollie Forrester and George Myatt just pipped McKenzie Snowden and Jonathan Turnbull. Gregor Reid and Simon Mills were third.

But for me, the on-track action was more than matched by the off-track craic. It was a chance to meet up with friends old and new although I can only apologise to a certain Irish fella who stopped by for a chat. For over 5 minutes I stood bemused and perplexed listening to a verbal fusillade of heavily accented incomprehension, and then he came back for another chat later. I still have little idea of the subject/s that was/were under discussion but by heck it was grand while it lasted. He could have put Sir Alex Ferguson’s famed ‘hair dryer’ harangues to shame.

Rally Day 2

 Here's one for fans of the Spanish language. These door panels were made up for him by a very good 'friend', but look closely at the bottom of the door panel - it translates to "Bullshit Merchant" !!! With friends like that  who needs enemies?

Rally - Night, night

 It was a busy day, time for bed!

Rally - Day 1 over

 Knockhill at night time. All tucked up ready for tomorrow and they go again.